October 2010 Monthly Visions: The I AM Upgrade
Owwwwaaaaaarrrrggghhhhhhhmmmpphhhh! Sometimes there isn’t the right word in the English language to describe feelings or current energies! Leading up to and in the days so far since September 23rd’s Spring/Fall Equinox and Full Moon on O degrees Aries we have been in the process of receiving quite the intense upgrade. Imagine a huge steam ship changing direction, or men having to manually lift heavy railroad tracks to point them another way. It’s a BIG process and there’s a lot of ‘Heave....Stop.....Lift......Heave....Stop.....Turn...Back up Back up... Slooowweeer Slooowweeer....Heave....” – you get my drift. It’s all happening, but it kinda feels like nothing is happening because while the upgrade is happening not a lot can happen!
Added to this, the universal plumbers have arrived and are changing our flow system. To do that they had to switch the water off for a bit. Oh you didn’t get your memo? It was the usual tradespeople speak: “Will be at your place to change the system sometime between 2005 and 2015.” So if your income has suddenly disappeared or finances are dwindling, (and you know you couldn’t be affirming abundance more if you tried) don’t despair. The good news is...the plumbers have obviously arrived at your place. They’ve switched off the flow temporarily, and your upgraded new and better flow is imminent. While you wait stick your IPOD on and go for a walk in nature. Put your feet up with a good book and a strong cup of tea. The alternative is to hover over them saying ‘Are you done yet? Are you done yet’ and really, that’s not helping anyone.
Our ship is turning to a new direction, headed to a new shore. Remember all those affirmations you’ve been saying “I now have an increased income. I now am with the love of my life” and so on? Well, as it turns out, the universe was listening after all. However in order to get to the new shore, your ship is having to turn around if it was in any way facing the direction of a shore you don’t really want to be heading in anymore. So for example let’s say you’ve been getting by financially in an okay kind of way. Money comes in dribs and drabs, you’re paying the bills, but can’t necessarily see how you’re going to manifest that new car or house anytime soon. Meanwhile you’ve been visualising huge sums of cash and a fabulous new mansion like crazy. You can see that your current work isn’t going to get you where you want to go, but at the end of the day it’s keeping you fed, clothed and sheltered and you’re not about to let that go for some pie-in-the-sky picture on a vision board right? Hmmmm...well the universe sees things a bit differently.
Our universal team of helpers are a mix of Tough Love meets Soul Boot Camp meets Faith Baby Faith. So, during this profound Equinox period they took the opportunity to say “You want more money? You want more love? You gooooooottttttt iiiiiiiitttttt!!!!!!!!!!!!! They came in, switched our current flow off, halted the boat engine, and started turning those train tracks in another direction. Momentarily it feels like someone shut off the lights and everyone’s gone home......but in reality we’re in that awkward uncomfortable kinda annoying place called ‘between here and there’. It’s not the first time, and it won’t be the last time, but here we are nevertheless.
While in this space you may have noticed something interesting happens when the flow is shut off. We have a little panic, and a little rage, and then PING PING PING lightbulb moment after lightbulb moment prodding us into ‘New Shore’ action! There’s nothing quite like one source of income drying up to give you the kick up the pants you needed to finally get that new idea off the ground! However, you won’t see or hear or feel your lightbulb moment if you are curled up in foetal position under the doona crying ‘Why me?’ so if this applies to you....GET UP!
Your ship IS being turned around. They are working like crazy to changeover the plumbing system. The universal electricians are helping us with our re-wiring. It is not just our physical reality that may be changing as a result of our ‘upgrade’– or for that matter even needs to change. The old shore/new shore relates first and foremost to our old way of being/new way of being, our old perspectives, attitudes and beliefs and our new perspectives, attitudes and beliefs. So when you look for your lightbulb moment regarding what needs to shift and change, don’t just look to your outer life. Look to your inner life. Where do you have to heave yourself out of certain thoughts or ways of looking at things and adjust your lens to a whole new level? When you look at your current reality, do you focus more on the things you appreciate, or the things you don’t like? When you think about your ideal reality, do you think about it with excited anticipation or with a sense of futility and frustration? Your perspectives may seem like a fluffy topic when it comes to wanting to know how to make changes to your life in a practical sense but they are energetically extremely powerful. They are the difference between your ship facing the right direction, or being stuck on a bunch of rocks unable to move forward.
Zero Degrees Aries (where the Full Moon was this Equinox) is connected to our I AM! We are all getting the WHO ARE YOU???? kick up the pants upgrade at the moment, in the universe’s attempt to move us into our authentic “I AM...” ! What is your fill in the blank for I AM? I AM abundant? I AM healthy? I AM happy? I AM miserable? I AM poor? I AM successful? I AM a failure? Do you affirm “I AM abundant” each morning but the waters you find your ship in daily tell you that you must be spending most of your time the rest of the day thinking, feeling or believing “I AM NOT abundant”? Do you dream about writing a novel - “I AM a writer” but spend most of your day toiling away at a 9-5 job – “I AM in a job I hate”? It may even be a job you like, BUT are you spending any time chipping away toward a job you LOVE?
So, step one re what to do during this ‘neither here nor there’ period: Work out your I AM. Look around at your life and take an honest stocktake and inventory. Your ideal and authentic I AM is one thing and we’ll get to that in a minute, but it is helpful to know the false, self-sabotaging ‘i am’ that lurks beneath, because that’s the current captain driving your ship! So look around and be honest. What must you honestly be spending most of your time thinking, feeling and believing about yourself in order to have created your current life? Is there a lack of inner power going on? Confidence? Self-worth? Self-value? Is there an over-abundance of self-doubt or doubt in the universe?
Sometimes we take more care with what we put into a cake than what we are putting into our own energy fields! So now is the time to get real and get that see-saw balanced (totally Equinox energy where the day and night is exactly the same in length). What do you need to chuck out of your mixing bowl, and what do you need to throw in a double if not triple dose of?
Okay so now we’re cooking (pardon the pun)! Next it’s time to look at your ideal and authentic I AM ingredients. Who are you REALLY and who are you IDEALLY? It’s the same thing, because your ideal is your real. So, if you are feeling you need to be more ‘Warrior Woman’ or ‘Power Man’ FEEL yourself as this. SEE yourself as this. ACT as if you are this. This will do more for your abundance attracting than a million affirmations said from a place of lack of power or worth.
Next, have something around you or on you that truly makes you FEEL like you are this new person, this new I AM version of you. It could be a new vision board you make and hang up in your bedroom, a photo of a totem animal or person that totally exudes the energy you ideally emanate. It could be a piece of jewellery you own that you decide to give new meaning to, or a piece of jewellery you buy yourself that is your “I love myself” ring or “I am powerful and prosperous’ bracelet or watch. EXUDE your IDEAL I AM Energy.
When do we get out of this ‘neither here nor there’ energy? Well, I’d like to say soon, but Venus (The Planet representing your Self-Worth and Self-Value and how those things show up in your life, so often represented by your state of Love and Money) is going retrograde Oct 14-Nov 18, with the shadow period having already taken affect as of Sep 6, and lasting until Dec 21 when Venus finally returns to where she was when she retrograded. December 21 being the Summer/Winter Solstice, I think it’s safe to say there’s our bookend to this particular ‘neither here nor there’ period. Perfectly timed for a powerful entry into 2011 with our I AM selves polished, upgraded and ready to roll!
The days leading up to 10-10-10 are VERY powerful. PAY ATTENTION to the lightbulb moments and insights that are coming up for you during this time, starting right now. They will give you a big clue as to what is keeping you stuck in the old, and how to more easefully move into the new. A HUGE message being downloaded into our consciousness’ now is: ‘Let go of the Illusion’. I will write more about that soon but for now let those words percolate in you.
October, and November for that matter, will test us on all levels regarding the questions: Who are you? Who do you believe you are? What do you think you are worth? What value do you give yourself? How does that worth and value show up in your life? What do you need to add or delete from your ‘mixing bowl’ to get your ideal I AM happening? Where are you in your Power and where are you Not? When I say all levels I don’t necessarily mean every area of our life, I more mean all energy levels: physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, etheric (chakras), cellular and DNA. These energy levels include stories, memories and patterns belonging to our parents, grandparents and ancestors so if you are finding something particularly hard or stubborn to shift it is well worth considering those areas for exploration. You can do this via journaling, meditation or a session with a reputable energy worker.
Start right now with one I AM.....and fill in the blank. Do you believe it when you say it? If not, what’s on the other side of it? What is your polar belief? Where did that belief come from?
Above all during this month LOVE yourself. Venus is about Love, especially the kind of love we tend to forget about the most: Self Love. If it all gets too much, and you feel like you’re over all the exploring, and want to say enough already with this process, just stop and Love Yourself. Really, that’s all any of us ever had to do. LOVE YOURSELF.
(c) Dana Mrkich 2010. Permission is granted to share this article freely on the condition that the author is credited, and the URL www.danamrkich.com is included